I hold in my hand, the end. This pill marks the end of my
two and half year, nine- medication journey with psychopharmacology. I was on
some of these medications for two weeks. Some for over a year. Sometimes one at
a time. And sometimes four. Some of these medications I should have never been
prescribed. Some caused more problems than they solved. Some were very low doses. Some were extremely high. They were
antidepressants, anticonvulsants, mood stabilizers, and antipsychotics. None
seemed to help.
I’m not cured and
I might have to live significant parts of my life struggling with things that
have become commonplace to me. But I am “okay.” At eighteen, I have seen many
things and worked many systems that most people won’t see or work in their
entire lives.
This final 150mg dose of Lithium marks the end of a journey
that I hope that I won’t have to embark on again. But if I do, I’m ready. I can
handle it.
I’m in it for the long-run, for the fight. I am strong.
And tomorrow morning, when I take what will hopefully be my
last dose of a psychiatric medication, I will be free!
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